10 Things I Wish I Knew at 18…

1.You are the shit…

…fuck what the rest say. What other think about you doesn’t matter. When you look in the mirror tell yourself everyday how stunning you are, how astonishing you are, how magnificent you are, and don’t let no one take that from you, EVER!

2. Always use a condom…

…spending time at the free clinic is not cute. Waiting for results is even worse. The lowest point is when you get that call to come in because they won’t give you the results over the phone. Even though they do that shit to scare you and let you know everything is okay and you’re clean, it’s a terrifying experience.

3. Leave the boys alone…

…they are a waste of time and will break your heart. Do you remember when you’re mama told you boys think with the wrong head? It’s ungodly true. Their dicks control their ever single thought. Try to remind your pussy of that.

4. Late night, early mornings…

…they are fun the night of but not the next day. Here’s a few key points to make those mornings easier.

  • Learn your limit quickly
  • Drink water in between drinks
  • Eat before you drink – some kind of carb will be best
  • Make sure you don’t have anything to do the next day
  • 11 shots of Patron is NEVER a good idea

5. Love with your whole heart…

…when you meet that man who safely keeps your heart, keep his safe too. When you have a great friend, love her like there’s no tomorrow. When you look in the mirror, love that girl you see and she will love you back.

6. Embrace your flaws, they’re beautiful…

So, you have a big ass forehead – so what, you’re still sexy. That flat ass of yours, the one everyone keeps calling an extension of your back and not an ass? Stop thinking something is wrong with you – it’s easier access from the back (if you know what I mean). That dark skin you have is beautiful and one day you will see that people will envy that about you.

7. Experiment but don’t continue…

I’m not going to give you a spiel about staying away from drugs because I know it won’t help but I still have some advice. All of those drugs you end up playing with, remember that can become a habit. Habits are what will kill you, at least almost.

8. Those bitches are not your friends...

They don’t make them like you anymore. Remember these quotes…


9. Naps are fucking awesome…

Take as many as you can and as often as you can. Being an adult takes a lot of time and energy so you are going to need some rest.

10. Read a fucking book…

 

They are fascinating! You are going to meet so many book boyfriends!

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